huy

Today i had a nightmare

It was about Fernando

I dreamed that i was meeting him for the first time again

He still was dating Veronica

And it was really awful

You see

There are wounds that heals really slowly, or never heal at all

Has been almost or maybe more than 3 years since we broke up

And i still have nightmares about it 

It still hurts someway

And I'm emotionally unavailable since we broke up, i haven't really be able to "fix myself" or to really trust anyone else again

Is kinda pathetic

Makes me sad 

I really don't need more sadness rn but 

Idk i can't control my dreams

I'll try not to think about it fot the rest fot the day

Is 5.30am after all